a whole new me

I wud say my trip 2 singapore was no coincident.

I recall the nite before my trip.
i was crying on my pillow.
dreadfully understanding dat his heart is no longer here.
I went 2 singapore with a burden heart.
wondering when will i ever be able 2 let go once n for all.
on the way there i really tot to myself, singapore will be a nice break from kl.

Sunday morn.
i woke up realisin its another morn in singapore.
my mum rushed in the room 2 call me awake.
she n my dad sat dwn 2 discuss with me where should we spent our sun morn at.
at the end of conversation, we decided to pay City Harvest Singapore a visit.
we attended the mornin chinese service to benefit my auntie hu was yet 2 be a christian.
initially, i felt a bit uncomfortable.
yes, i understood chinese,
but i duno those songs dat thy r singing.
i tried 2 worship God.
but like as it had been usual now, it was jus another routine i put on.

soon ltr, the chinese pastor step on.
n ven he mention the title of his msg.
it striked me deep in!
DONT LOOK BACK.
dat was his msg.
tho many of us mite have heard tis a lot of times. it shook me awake listenin 2 his msg.
dn look bak, dn remind urself bout pass hurt, dn tok bout pass missunderstandings,
becuz God has a beta plan for me nex year.
it is not the end of ur life yet.
i had alwaz keep remindin myself how cruel is he
how much sweet memories we had
how much he use 2 love me
and at the end of it
i will be very hurt of my current state
dat msg literally told me 2 let go once n for all

afta dat service, i have decided to enjoy my singapore trip,
n leave al my pain n hurts in singapore.
2009.
its gona be my great year.
some of u mite say dat im jus living in denial.
but 2 me,
its beta than hurtin myself n remindin myself bout d hurts.
so yea... im done wit tis.
im goin on.

truth 2 be told.
i believe i can do beta than tis.
becuz.
God. He is wit me!

p.s my auntie accepted Christ again. woohoo!!~~